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Time

With a time elapse of around ten months since I quit my job one would finally understand what they want to do in their life.I was sure that the decision of quitting my job and taking the time off to decide on the things I really want to do in life was a wise decision.

I knew what I wanted to do and I was completely sure that it was going to work out.So today when I meet an old friend I run to the opposite direction lest they see my face and recognize me.

You will think why?
I mean why should you run from a friend? That's so stupid.

Well its not if you are terrified to answer their most important and "who you actually are" going to define question , "so,what are you doing these days?"

The moment I hear it, the person in front of me is no more visible. All I can see is myself doing something I quit my job for...
Watching Romedy on my T.V
Eating food
Sleeping
Doing house chores
Sleeping
Grocery shopping
Cooking
Eating
Watching T.V
Sleeping

and a vicious circle that goes and on and on and then I find myself saying,"you know,I quit my job so I am really thinking for a business or maybe something in teaching.  I haven't yet decided.I am just taking the time off.There are plans but its too soon to say anything.I am even considering marriage so its all too mixed up.I am still deciding."

And then the look of confusion and suspicion and eventually pity spreads across your friend's face and they are like yeah you should do that.Its good and blah blah blah.

What do I mean here?

(Sigh)  Its very simple.

Today not having a job to do implies that you are simply wasting your time.Or you are someone who is not responsible and not taking life seriously and living off of your family or immature or simply lazy.

What if I am none of those things and I am simply unable to understand what it is really that I want to do?
What if all my dreams from my school days and college days and job days have all piled up and now I am just not sure which ones to pick up to start with?

I know that what you do defines you.But what if there is no definition for you?
What if you are something new and there is still no definition around to describe who you are?
What do you do then?

I wish I knew what I want.
Or what people like me want?
That is if there are people like me.(Will hate to be a Kryptonian).
So to those who are still clueless to their calling in life...

you are not alone...






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